My Pearly Whites
Jun 05
i’m not sure if i’ve mentioned it before (achem) but i hate going to the dentist. alright so i might have said something about it HERE, and HERE, and HERE.
i’m not sure where my hatred of the dentist comes from – every dentist that i have ever met has been perfectly nice. but my hatred and fear (it’s a combination really) have been part of me for as long as i can remember. did you ever notice that being a dentist tends to run in a family? that’s funky.
growing up i went to the same dentist as BLOSSOM. my mom would try to lure me to the appointment with promises of running into my teen idol in the waiting room (never happened). as soon as i walked into the office i’d have to make my way up to the reception desk to ask for the bathroom key so that i could, uh, deal with a nervous stomach (let’s leave it at that). why, at the dentist, must you always ask for a bathroom key? seems so unnecessary. not only was there the promise of being poked and scraped when forced to go in for a visit, but to make a bad situation worse, this dentist happened to be an observant jew who would make me practice my torah blessings in the years leading up to my bat mitzvah. talk about dread!
when we moved across the country we said so long to the fancy beverly hills dentist and hello to…cavities. somehow i made it through my first 17 years without a blemish on my pearly whites and then with my first dentist appointment in good ol’ westport connecticut i was told that i had 3 cavities and needed to have my wisdom teeth removed. if i didn’t hate the dentist before, i sure as hell did now. i think that this dentist also employed nuns as his receptionists. just an interesting tidbit.
when i moved to boston we had a crazy cool dentist who gossiped with his hot hygienst as he checked my teeth. when i had to have a cavity filled he put this weird, green, stretchy plastic thing over my mouth. it covered part of my face and made it hard to breathe. i continued to hate the dentist.
upon arriving in san francisco a friend recommended a dentist who understood my issues (and possibly offered laughing gas as a way of easing any tension i might feel). he happened to have pretty gnarly teeth himself (not dirty, just crooked and crammed – not what you’d expect, you know?) but his hygienst talked a million miles a minute, offering super interesting tips and tricks about oral hygiene so that (and the gas) sorta made going to the dentist not the most awful experience imaginable. unfortunately, my dentist’s much younger wife happened to have given birth the same week that EBN was born and after running into each other in the hallway, he invited himself into my room, while i was breastfeeding my not-yet-18-hour old kiddo. it was super awkward. i had to quit that dentist.
which brings us to now. yes, it had been 18 months since i’d had my teeth cleaned and even worse, i’d dropped the ball for ABN as well (he takes care of our finances while i make sure that we are up to date with oral care). turns out, i should have been coming to pacifica for my dentistry all along. not only does SHORE VIEW DENTAL have a shore view, but i got to watch a movie throughout my power wash (i had never had a power cleaning before but let me tell you – it was AWESOME). i got a tour of the kids area as well and i think if i bring EBN to this dentist, she might sorta love it. i’m not saying i’m looking forward to having an old cavity redone in in the next couple of weeks (because apparently that happens) but least i can find out how THE PROPOSAL ends.






